Thursday Afternoon Monday Morning Podcast 4-15-21

1 067 Դիտումներ 114հզր

Bill rambles about shots, sports, and cooking.
Full Episodes of the Monday Morning Podcast:
Full Episodes of the Thursday Afternoon Podcast:
Full Episodes of the MMP One-Shots:
Here’s the website!
I was born a freckled child in a land far away during a much simpler time. I did well in school until it counted. As a freshman in high school I had dreams of going to Notre Dame and becoming a lawyer. By the time I was sophomore I was taking shop class and was considering getting into construction. I ended up working in warehousing and unloading trucks. Other than stand up, that job was the most fun I ever had.
I am now a stand up comedian. I do a couple hundred shows a year. And I enjoy the travel. I’ve done four hour-long stand-up specials: “Why Do I Do This”, “Let It Go”, “You People Are All The Same” and “I’m Sorry You Feel That Way.” I host a podcast each week called The Monday Morning Podcast. And I have an animated series on Netflix called: ‘F’ Is For Family.’ Occasionally I act in movies but only when they let me.


  1. Old Man
    Old Man
    3 օր առաջ


  2. Logan Outlaw
    Logan Outlaw
    6 օր առաջ

    You 100% can do that. Its first amendment protected free speech.

  3. Greg Cullers
    Greg Cullers
    11 օր առաջ

    Everyone gather around and listen to a rich man tell us it is okay to be strangled by the government. Dont forget, if you dont agree with losing your business you are selfish.

  4. AD/HD GuitarLessons
    AD/HD GuitarLessons
    14 օր առաջ

    this sucks now

    15 օր առաջ

    People are dying because they are old and fat.

  6. northside shorty nick
    northside shorty nick
    15 օր առաջ

    “oh my god i’m getting douche chills” 😂😂😂😂😂

  7. OT S
    OT S
    15 օր առաջ

    is he ginger or bald?

  8. Simon Parker
    Simon Parker
    16 օր առաջ


  9. Alex Scott
    Alex Scott
    16 օր առաջ

    Thanks Bill. I really needed to hear the ex/ breakup bits.

  10. Ndubuisi Obah
    Ndubuisi Obah
    17 օր առաջ

    The attorney guy is speaking for himself and is seriously depressed. I am an attorney and I enjoy it every day. Moreover, I am trying to see where he is getting a lot of money being a public defender.

  11. treehunned
    17 օր առաջ

    Doctor's def need to talk more shit can you imagine the cooks?

  12. trip
    17 օր առաջ

    thats not why its called the dirty south lol

  13. Sir Dr. Michael Mills, Phd. Esq.
    Sir Dr. Michael Mills, Phd. Esq.
    18 օր առաջ

    I felt a little ' we're'd'

  14. Sir Dr. Michael Mills, Phd. Esq.
    Sir Dr. Michael Mills, Phd. Esq.
    18 օր առաջ

    Wasn't she like hey ain't you Bill Burr? Hey sweetie go a head

  15. Sir Dr. Michael Mills, Phd. Esq.
    Sir Dr. Michael Mills, Phd. Esq.
    18 օր առաջ


  16. Sir Dr. Michael Mills, Phd. Esq.
    Sir Dr. Michael Mills, Phd. Esq.
    18 օր առաջ


  17. Sir Dr. Michael Mills, Phd. Esq.
    Sir Dr. Michael Mills, Phd. Esq.
    18 օր առաջ

    I am fairly certain that I'm not a normal listener Mr Bill Burr! You pink little bastard, LOL

  18. drewgrissom
    18 օր առաջ

    He just kept nodding.... hes a banker Bill, how much coke did he do before you started talking to him? he was probably just high.

  19. Skratch Rapture
    Skratch Rapture
    18 օր առաջ

    During the MVMT ad read, I had to say: Forgive him Lord, for he knows not what he speaks.

  20. drewgrissom
    18 օր առաջ

    "Sorry if im scatter brained", Bill... that's the podcast. That's why I listen. I want scatterbrained :D

  21. Jelly Jams
    Jelly Jams
    18 օր առաջ

    Hey Bill what the fuck are you doing putting cinnamon on pancakes

  22. BHW
    19 օր առաջ

    I hear Bill Burr 5 years ago telling Bill Burr today "what're you, crazy?! You're telling me these empty hospitals and a 99.999999999% survival rate gets blasted on the news for a year and then magically this cold virus shot with a biosensor in it, developed by DARPA and a notorious eugenicist comes along and you're just whistlin your way down to CVS?!? You got krispy kreme giving you donuts every day for a year if you take the thing that only kills fatties and olds! Nothin addin up for ya, buddy boy?? Is that gay little button you get after give you the same feeling as the sucker at the poediatrician when you were a little boy?"

  23. Buffalo Kids - GEMATRIA
    Buffalo Kids - GEMATRIA
    19 օր առաջ

    @Bill Burr, longtime listener here and fuckin’ love you pal! But then numbers of “6” are wrong and just what you’ve heard reported...I personally know over 20 people with serious complications, like 5 which are suffering as we speak for over 3 weeks or better...sober, middle age and healthy for the most part mind you. My aunt who’s a head RN at our local hospital and she herself suffered complications and has told my family some horror stories that haven’t been in our news...she’s also a great heart non-conspiracy church going woman, so I don’t question her information she’s shared either. 👍🏼

  24. NaN NaN
    NaN NaN
    19 օր առաջ

    Why do I keep getting redirected to Bill Burr after every Cumtown video? These things are not the same.

  25. RaJuR Real Deep Kool Dope Smuuv BarZ & BundalZ
    RaJuR Real Deep Kool Dope Smuuv BarZ & BundalZ
    19 օր առաջ

    cant beleeve you sold out!!! you WERE MY HOMIE.....BYE BOY!!!

  26. Digtial Cowboy
    Digtial Cowboy
    20 օր առաջ

    Bill Burr SOLD OUT both days in LAS VEGAS.... SOLD OUT in less then a 24 HOURS. lol resale on those cheap seats is 200+...anyone going??!!

  27. Chris Puckett
    Chris Puckett
    20 օր առաջ

    Malts on the weekend 🤣🤣🤣

  28. Chris Puckett
    Chris Puckett
    20 օր առաջ

    Just got my second shot yesterday and all of these exact thoughts are going through my head!!

    20 օր առաջ

    RIP Bill

  30. Phil Spill
    Phil Spill
    20 օր առաջ

    It's fucking Headspace Maaaaan!😝

  31. Strike3
    21 օր առաջ

    New True Crime Segment: It Doesn't Add Up

  32. algonc the 3rd
    algonc the 3rd
    21 օր առաջ

    Love ya Bill. Long time follower. As a doctor I agree with you. Apparently Facebook knows more than me

  33. Lawrence Gillespie
    Lawrence Gillespie
    21 օր առաջ

    No one that listens to this podcast is normal. Wait, I listen to this podcast. I got the 2nd dose of Moderna and the next day was rough, but then that was it; my GF got it a lot worse, yet my 101-year-old grandma had no reaction from either dose of Pfizer. I guess it's different for everyone.

  34. John Davies
    John Davies
    21 օր առաջ

    BILL you are amazing I've just watched the mandalorian .. Sheesh that PTSD moment at the table...thank you

  35. Qibili
    21 օր առաջ

    Billy Blue Balls is a legend: the only person to ever move from Law to Construction career.

  36. apple IIe
    apple IIe
    21 օր առաջ

    The lawyer that sent you the email should go to a local airport and work with an A&P and/or IA to see if he truly likes the mechanical side of aviation. He could also try Aviation Law first so he doesn't have to "jump ship" out of that industry. In both cases, he doesn't have to move to Seattle right now. Good luck to him and I hope he follows his dreams.

  37. coveringfish
    21 օր առաջ

    That botched movement ad was the first time I’ve wanted to buy a movement watch or blue light glasses

  38. Steer wheel Holder
    Steer wheel Holder
    21 օր առաջ

    2:18 it's always seems to be girls doing this. Usually early 20s thinking no one will tell them anything because they got a vag. Not with me, get that smelly vag to the back of the line. ,😤

  39. S. Eric Becker
    S. Eric Becker
    21 օր առաջ

    Und ze Pfizer, jawohl!

  40. McGear
    21 օր առաջ

    Baltimore is going to have a long year? They have had a long last few decades.

  41. Stephen Simpson
    Stephen Simpson
    21 օր առաջ

    Enough covid already move on bill

  42. Andrew Acosta
    Andrew Acosta
    21 օր առաջ

    20:20 - 26:00 Commercial Break

    21 օր առաջ

    Bro...if GOD can cure me of the many STDs I got in the marines and a skank ex wife wookie female marine and lets not talk about the Iraq brain damage and brain surgery but....HE can fucking save me from covid brah 😤

      21 օր առաջ

      If that aint apparent the stds are from the wookie lol fml

  44. John Smith
    John Smith
    21 օր առաջ

    This guy steps on a hot battery, thinks it’s a mouse, then segues in to fighting saber tooth tigers as a caveman “fight or flight”

  45. Vova3iLvova
    21 օր առաջ


  46. katana_92
    21 օր առաջ

    Gold intro lmao

  47. travis coates
    travis coates
    21 օր առաջ

    "Bored shitless"...Lol WTF

  48. Chris Teene
    Chris Teene
    21 օր առաջ

    Coming from a family who blows their top in dramatic ways,this was good to hear,lol! In the end, you just have to ask yourself if that was worth your energy, and did it accomplish anything productive . Love ya ,Bill🙌

  49. Tinus Robertson
    Tinus Robertson
    21 օր առաջ

    I got the vaccine.. and I lost 7kgs !!! Couldn't believe it !! Side effect.. my joints are pretty sore though, and I need some new running shoes..

  50. Lucapotamus Thomasmus
    Lucapotamus Thomasmus
    21 օր առաջ

    So many big names that I've always considered somewhat reasonable and intelligent are getting this vaccine and it makes absolutely no sense to me. Like, what kind of feckless sheep that's under 70 without other serious medical conditions. It's truly pathetic, what a duk'n loser.

  51. Spells Of Truth
    Spells Of Truth
    21 օր առաջ

    Guy who invented polio vaxxine, Jonas Salk, wrote in his book "Survival of the Wisest" that its only natural selection for the strong to genetically modify the weak with vaxxines to make them dumber and more submissive cattle. You the weak Billy boy. Doctors are naive, evil, or cowards in an incredible amount of debt. The entire medical system hinges on doctors being immune from prosecution for murder as long as the doctor follows the 'standard of care'. Who writes the standard of care 'Billy boy'? The drug companies, hospitals, and insurance companies. Drug companies have zero incentive to cure anyone ever because thats a lost customer(doctors are reprimanded for saying the word 'cure'), hospitals are paid 5 times more when a patient dies than when they live by our own government, and insurance companies are scam artists preying on human beings who are afraid of death. You used to be suspicious of the mainstream narrative 'Billy boy'. You used to be 'Billy man', wtf happened?

  52. Josh McArdle
    Josh McArdle
    21 օր առաջ

    I believe in conspiracies😂 that’s… why I’m here

  53. John M.
    John M.
    21 օր առաջ

    Bill Burr will be dead in a year. This sucks.

  54. Chris Pepper
    Chris Pepper
    21 օր առաջ

    Who listens to this unfunny crap? AMget keeps making me listen. Fuck it's not funny.

  55. train diesel
    train diesel
    21 օր առաջ

    john Bonham is Larry bird of drums. solid fundamentals, not too much flash, and white dudes fuckin love him :)

  56. Richard Metza II
    Richard Metza II
    21 օր առաջ

    Why ya goin to Indianapolis Bill?

  57. Trauma16
    21 օր առաջ

    We respect you too, Bill💯

  58. HondaMoto633
    21 օր առաջ

    The ad read was funnier than the topics 😂

    21 օր առաջ

    "The only thing that's stopping you is a conversation w the people you work with and a couple of suitcases." GOLD!

  60. Steven
    21 օր առաջ

    Even Kamala said she wouldn't take the vaccine. Why don't you rant about that?

  61. Aaron King
    Aaron King
    21 օր առաջ

    this is an old upload i feel like

  62. Kill Everyone
    Kill Everyone
    22 օր առաջ

    fuck you, bill burr. I'm trying to listen to cumtown

  63. ShivaShaktification
    22 օր առաջ

    the guy kept nodding and saying "you're right" because he wanted to enjoy the strippers and you were bugging him, bill

  64. Hexapus Ink
    Hexapus Ink
    22 օր առաջ

    Bill Burr or his assistant needs to do a "life advice" clip episode. I'm sure someone has edited one together on youtube but it would be great if Bill put one together himself. This man kept me sane years ago when I was unloading trucks at 4am. Just listening to him and all his own similar struggles with life, back before he was a super star, was a real life saver. He still fuckin nails the life lessons today. He just casually drops truth bombs on his listeners.

  65. Bill Masters
    Bill Masters
    22 օր առաջ

    Bill burr thinks covid 19 is killing hundreds of thousands of people my God

  66. Danny Prichard
    Danny Prichard
    22 օր առաջ

    I really miss the old Bill. He'd have wanted to kick this new guy's ass.

  67. Ryan Scarborough
    Ryan Scarborough
    22 օր առաջ

    Damn Bill taking experimental vaccines over a common cold and quoting mainstream stats now? Disney money changes you. Wish Patrice was here to beat your ass

  68. Vacation. Pls
    Vacation. Pls
    22 օր առաջ

    The fact that this is audio only enables me to keep working. Fuck you Bill for making me responsible and making me do my job. Trolling me and dont even know it.

  69. kanshou
    22 օր առաջ


  70. R.I.P
    22 օր առաջ

    I wish i knew about e-voice this time last year

  71. Diehard Outdoors
    Diehard Outdoors
    22 օր առաջ

    Watches real house wife’s and blames it on his wife! Lol but knows everything about it! Well if that’s not every pats fan, pussyfooting cry baby lie k cheaters

  72. Josh Gay
    Josh Gay
    22 օր առաջ

    Is it me or is the very first part of every episode the best love the rants

  73. Henrik
    22 օր առաջ

    That lawyer writing in at 1:28:00 and moaning about everyone else sure has some issues lmao, jesus christ, get a grip son

  74. Bozack Tbc
    Bozack Tbc
    22 օր առաջ

    Nobody knows what is gonna happen to you in a few yeArs after a tidal wave of shit is injected into your arm,,,nobody.👍

    1. Bozack Tbc
      Bozack Tbc
      22 օր առաջ

      @thej762000 I know my friend,,,haven’t believed a word of it from day 1.

    2. thej762000
      22 օր առաջ

      If Billy Boy wants to vaxx himself all the livelong day that's his prerogative. Just don't make me do it. By the by, if Bill does have an adverse reaction at some point, guess what Pfizer's liability is? Zero.

  75. The Jersey Comic
    The Jersey Comic
    22 օր առաջ

    Bill advertises for ting, it’s a phone service. Wish I heard this before I got it, but getting unlimited data, full service, and hotspot $45/month. Coming from Verizon’s $80-85, it’s great service, def recommend. There’s cheaper options too for like $25.

  76. ianscreams
    22 օր առաջ

    Alphabetical Spices. Sleeping w the Enemy

  77. Fry
    22 օր առաջ

    Bill alphabetises the spices and gets mad when they aren't... strikingly similar to Mr. Stotch in "Butters very own episode"!!!

  78. sativa rosegold
    sativa rosegold
    22 օր առաջ

    I'm with you on organization Bill. Get her Breathe Right strips for her birthday and a kick in the ass

  79. Striff Bazooki
    Striff Bazooki
    22 օր առաջ

    If your older get the vaccine. If your younger get the virus. Young people will beat the virus and develop the antibodies naturally but since a young persons immune response is robust, they can have an over reaction from the vaccine. An older persons immune system is worn down so it won’t detect the virus soon enough before it multiplies and spreads. When it does it’s too late and their immune systems goes into a cytokine storm. When a oldnper takes the vaccine, the rna doesn’t replicate like the virus and since their immune system is older, it will not overreact and produce antibodies slowly. This is only my theory and is not proven anywhere. It’s a hypothesis that I am sure is true because it’s based in common sense.

  80. Nu York22
    Nu York22
    22 օր առաջ

    Will China take over USA soon?

  81. joeyripswell
    22 օր առաջ

    99.96% of people survive it of the .04% that do die 50% are over the age of 70 PANDEMIC!!!!!!!!!! gg bill did you get the black eye yet?

  82. bryandogman
    23 օր առաջ

    This podcast comes on immediately after everything I listen to, I’m convinced Bill Burr is the least funny person of all time. You would find most people in the street are funnier then bill burr.

    1. bryandogman
      23 օր առաջ

      The big scream/shout in the intro is enough to make you sick

  83. Carlton
    23 օր առաջ

    as a former boeing worker in seattle, hearing this lawyer was serendipitous

  84. Melanin Farmer
    Melanin Farmer
    23 օր առաջ

    Who watches this shit lmao its so boring

  85. AweSomo84
    23 օր առաջ

    It’s not a cure and it will not prevent shit your not making antibodies nothing you will need a shot every year because it doesn’t work . Gl being a living experiment

  86. Joshua Tyrone & Blues N Trouble
    Joshua Tyrone & Blues N Trouble
    23 օր առաջ

    I used to have a lot of respect for Bill Burr but he's really sold out in recent years. He used to question everything but to hear that he actually just got his second covid vaccination? Everyone's a sheep these days

    1. AweSomo84
      23 օր առաջ

      Yeah we’re living the walking death

  87. Rabby D
    Rabby D
    23 օր առաջ

    Don't worry Bill I got my second one too. At least we'll have that 25 point IQ drop together

  88. D Will
    D Will
    23 օր առաջ

    The spices?!😂😂😂

  89. Paz Since81
    Paz Since81
    23 օր առաջ

    I got the Johnson n Johnson last month I got sick for a week but I get sick from just being around people the hell with covid “stupidity” is the deadliest thing out there and it’s highly contagious especially around dipshits it spreads like wild fire 🔥 and about them cars we be getting the shit done MOVE THEM IN MOVE THEM OUT’ (ROLL ON)... CODA IS. A GOOD ALBUM ... MUCH LUV N SUPPORT

  90. jawad kazmi
    jawad kazmi
    23 օր առաջ

    16:17 'I kept my cool and everybody had a nice morning.' Hopefully at nobody's expense.

  91. Mike Kenders
    Mike Kenders
    23 օր առաջ

    Vaccine for what?

  92. Galactic Seabass
    Galactic Seabass
    23 օր առաջ


  93. s02 Pzychotik
    s02 Pzychotik
    23 օր առաջ


  94. Tugis Art Studio
    Tugis Art Studio
    23 օր առաջ

    I would like to see your reaction when it comes out that Alex Jones was right about the vaccine. You have less than 10 more year on planet earth. Sorry.

  95. xXx Gaming
    xXx Gaming
    23 օր առաջ

    Bill you gotta turn on the camera dude

  96. Charlie
    23 օր առաջ

    "your honor I don't have a penis... how could me mace me"

  97. david windhausen
    david windhausen
    23 օր առաջ

    2 weeks to flatten the curve for a year straight. Trusted scientist recalled a vaccine previously deemed safe(proving they didn't do enough testing) No masks, 1 mask, 2 masks, and back to 1 mask. They don't know what they're talking about. Most of the so called "anti-vaccine" are people whove come the conclusion that our leadership is completely incompetent, and by taking the vaccine, were admitting that our leadership is competent and effective which is a total joke. We'd also be admitting that those in power have the right to take away our rights as long as they can make a case that they're trying to make us safer. I'd like to add that this route is much more dangerious than just taking the vaccine because we're taking on the leftist mob while having our rights taken away for not complying.

  98. A2B
    23 օր առաջ

    Just re-alphabetized the spice rack. Thanks Bill!

  99. Ⅎaceᖘalm Theᗯoяld
    Ⅎaceᖘalm Theᗯoяld
    23 օր առաջ

    bill got the placebo

  100. Ⅎaceᖘalm Theᗯoяld
    Ⅎaceᖘalm Theᗯoяld
    23 օր առաջ

    not supposed to have clear piss, bill. where are your vitamins?